Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jellybeans
by strongbad58450
Summary: Well, it wasn't easy, but everything's straightened out. As always, the characters are the same. I'm including some new characters and some returning characters with different roles. Join Crash as he fulfills his Jedi destiny. Please review.
1. Chapter 1: Jabba's Palace

Star Wars

Episode VI: Return of the Jellybeans

Chapter 1: Jabba's Palace

The usual credits show up and is voiced by Aku Aku.

Aku Aku: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. STAR WARS!!! Episode VI: Return of the Jedi. Luke Skywalker has returned to his home planet of Tatooine to free his friend Han Solo from the clutches of the vile gangster Jabba the Hutt. What Luke doesn't know is that the Empire is secretly building a space station much more stronger than the original Death Star. When completed, it will spell- SECOND DEATH STAR?! What the blah what?! We risked our lives destroying the first one and they're building a second one?! I did not sign up for this! I don't remember actually signing up for anything! Eh, what the heck. I love this movie series, anyway. Enjoy the story.

We pan down to see that a second Death Star is under construction and a star destroyer approaches it. Soon an Imperial shuttle is jettisoned from the ship with two TIE fighter escorts heading for the Death Star. As it lands in the hangar, hundreds of troops and officers are lined up. The commander of the Death Star, portrayed by Chariman Drek, approaches. The shuttle opens and Darth Vader, portrayed by Uka Uka, departs from his shuttle.

Commander: Lord Vader, your visit here is unexpected.

Darth Vader: How is the construction on the Death Star?

Commander: We are working as hard as we can. We will have it up and running as soon as possible.

Darth Vader: Perhaps you are not pushing your men to the limit. The Emperor wants this station operational now.

Commander: With all due respect, he asks for the impossible. There is no way we can speed up the process.

Darth Vader: Then perhaps you can tell him that when he gets here.

All the others gasp. A Ratnician faints.

Commander: The Emperor's coming here?

Darth Vader: He is most displeased with your work ethic and is coming to oversee the operation.

Commander: We shall double our efforts.

Darth Vader: I hope so, for your sake. The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am.

Vader leaves to await the Emperor. Meanwhile, on Tatooine, C-3PO and R2-D2, portrayed by Ratchet and Clank, move to Jabba's palace.

R2-D2: Beep. Boop. I cannot believe we are back here.

C-3PO: Yeah. Well, don't get too comfortable. Lando and Chewbacca never made it back from here. We must tread carefully. This Jabba the Hutt is supposed to be really dangerous.

R2-D2: Just what we need.

They approach the palace entrance.

R2-D2: Here we are.

C-3PO: Big door. I'd better knock.

R2-D2: Be my guest.

3PO knocks on the door.

C-3PO: Well, no one's home. Let's go.

A talking ball thing, voiced by Pinstripe Potoroo, pops out of the door like in the movie. Thanks to modern technology, everyone speaking Huttese is now translated so you can understand what they say.

Ball: Who is it?

C-3PO: Whoa.

Ball: Who are you with?

C-3PO: I'm with R2-D2.

R2-D2: Nice to meet you.

Ball: Back off!

R2-D2: I say!

Ball: And who are you?

C-3PO: C-3PO.

Ball: What do you want?

C-3PO: We are here to see Jabba the Hutt?

Ball: Here to see the master? That's rich. Ha ha ha!

The ball retreats back into the door.

C-3PO: Somehow, I get the feeling that we're not wanted here.

R2-D2: I suggest we wait.

C-3PO: No. We'd better go.

Just then, the door opens and R2 enters the palace with 3PO close behind.

C-3PO: R2! R2, wait! We shouldn't rush into this.

3PO sees a giant spider thing behind him.

C-3PO: AAH! Wait for me!

A few seconds later, R2 runs into a gamorrean guard, portrayed by SharpClaw.

R2-D2: Whoa! Hey, ugly.

Gamorrean guard: Watch what you say!

C-3PO: R2! Don't leave me like that!

The door closes behind them.

C-3PO: Oh, that's not good.

Voice: You!

Bib Fortuna, portrayed by Nitrous Oxide, approaches.

Bib Fortuna: What are you doing here?

R2-D2: We are here to present a message to Jabba the Hutt.

C-3PO: Yes.

R2-D2: And a gift.

C-3PO: Ye- Gift? What gift?

Bib Fortuna: Sorry. Jabba does not want to barter. Why don't you give _me _the message and be on your way.

R2-D2: It's not for you. It's for Jabba.

Bib Fortuna: Are you going to give me the message?

R2-D2: It's only for Jabba.

Bib Fortuna: Give me the message.

R2-D2: Only for Jabba.

C-3PO: Sorry. We are told to deliver the message to Jabba and Jabba only.

R2-D2: That's what I just said. Threeve times. Don't you listen?

C-3PO: Shut it!

R2-D2: You shut it!

C-3PO: You shut it!

Bib Fortuna: Enough! I'll take you to Jabba.

C-3PO: Well, that worked out nicely. At least we didn't get chopped up.

R2-D2: I'm sure that might be coming up next.

Next Time:

Chapter 2: Mysterious Visitor


	2. Chapter 2: Mysterious Visitor

Star Wars

Episode VI: Return of the Jellybeans

Chapter 2: Mysterious Visitor

In Jabba's private chambers, Jabba the Hutt, portrayed by Emperor Velo XXVII, is relaxing doing who knows what. In the chamber with him are Dingodile, King Bowser, General Scales, several Heartless, Demyx and Xigbar of Organization XIII, Ripper Roo, the Komodo Brothers, Pinstripe Potoroo, Papu Papu, Nefarious Tropy, N. Trance, Star Wolf, Dr. Eggman, and any video game character that's passed off as a smuggler or bounty hunter. Ripto, Dr. Nefarious and Willie Wumpa Cheeks are in there along with Cortex and the gang. Strong Bad, Strong Mad and The Cheat are there and there's a lot of them and I'm not naming them all. Anyway, C-3PO and R2-D2 enter the chamber and confront Jabba. Bib Fortuna talks to his master.

Bib Fortuna: Master, these two have a message for you.

C-3PO: Play the message.

R2-D2: On it.

A hologram of Luke Skywalker, once again portrayed by Crash Bandicoot, appears in the room.

Luke: Greetings, Jabba the Hutt. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Luke Skywalker, Jedi Knight and a friend of Han. I wish to seek an audience with you to barter for Captain Solo's life.

Pete from the Heartless: Fat chance.

Dingodile: Is he crazy?

Luke: With your wisdom, I'm sure we can learn about one another. In exchange for Han, I present to you a gift: These two droids.

C-3PO: What did he say?

R2-D2: I try not to think about it.

Luke: Both are hardworking and will serve you well.

C-3PO: Turn it off!

Luke: Since I heard about your foot fungus, 3PO will be able to fix that no problem.

C-3PO: AAAH! Turn it off! Turn it off!

Luke: After that, he'll clip your toenails since you can't reach your feet.

C-3PO: Turn it off, dang it!

R2-D2: What are you talking about? This is funny.

Luke: Once he does that, he will give you a relaxing sponge bath.

C-3PO: THAT'S ENOUGH!!!!

3PO yanks the message out of R2 and stomps on it fast and furiously.

R2-D2: You have to admit, that was pretty funny.

C-3PO: I'M NOT LAYING A FINGER ON THAT THING!!!

R2-D2: Oh, this is going to be hilarious.

C-3PO: NO, IT IS NOT!!!

Demyx: What was that guy talking about?

Evil Twins: Is he crazy?

N. Tropy: That guy's a Jedi?

Bib Fortuna: The boy claims that he's a Jedi?

Dr. Nefarious: Sounds like a load of baloney. What do you think, Boba Fett?

Oh, did I forget that Boba Fett, portrayed by Nina Cortex, is there as well along with her Brat Girls?

Jabba: Silence! There will be no bargain. I will not give up my prized possession. Captain Solo stays where he is.

Pan over to Han Solo, portrayed by made-up character Raccoon Joe, still frozen in carbonite.

C-3PO: R2. It's Captain Solo. And he's still frozen in carbonite.

Everyone laughs except Boba Fett and her Brat Girls.

3PO and R2 are now being led to some sort of droid room like in the move and are now talking to a droid portrayed by Metal Sonic.

Metal Sonic: Are you a protocol droid?

C-3PO: The name's C-3PO, human-

Metal Sonic: Yes or no will do.

C-3PO: Yes.

Metal Sonic: How many languages do you speak?

C-3PO: Well, I _am _fluent in over 2,000 languages, including-

Metal Sonic: Splendid. We are in dire need of a new protocol droid ever since the master got frustrated with the old one and disintegrated him.

C-3PO: Disintegrated?

Pan over to a protocol droid, portrayed by Lord Crump, being disintegrated.

Lord Crump: I thought he said he wanted a coffee! I didn't know he wanted a Pepsi! Don't forget the where-the-sun-don't-shine. Everyone always forgets that part.

C-3PO: Oh, boy.

Metal Sonic: Take him in the back and have him fitted with a restraining bolt.

3PO is taken away.

C-3PO: R2! Don't leave me!

R2-D2: Hey! Let him go!

Metal Sonic: You're a feisty little one. But you'll soon learn some respect. I have need for you on the master's sail barge. And I think you'll fit in nicely.

A huge bang is heard.

Lord Crump: Yep! You got it.

Meanwhile, back in the main chambers, Jabba and the gang are having a talent show. Ripper Roo, Willie Wumpa Cheeks, and Pinstripe Potoroo have just finished playing "What is Love" by Haddaway.

Bib Fortuna is holding a microphone: Alright! Way to go boys! Next up is the appeasement competition! Four bands will play their best song to appease Master Jabba! If he likes it, they'll move on to the next round. But, if it's the worst song he's ever heard, you will get a big surprise. So, up first is XANA from the show Code Lyoko! The song they will be doing is the song from "Revenge of the Nerds." Let's listen.

XANA's monsters, including a tarantula, two creepers, a hornet, and a crab take the stage. The two creepers do the opening and the tarantula does the violin. The hornet plays the guitar and the crab is doing the gong. Finally, we have a polymorphing specter singing the lyrics with the roachsters and a mega tank clapping along. The song ends and everyone is clapping and cheering.

Bib Fortuna: Well done, boys! What do you think, Jabba? Do they rock or suck?

Jabba: Hmm...Bring them on!

Bib Fortuna: You heard it here! They are spared from the surprise! Next up is Demyx, some shadows from the Heartless, and Panther from Star Wolf! They will be playing the song "Do Ya" by the ELO.

They play and do fabulously. Everyone cheers wildly.

Bib Fortuna: There you have it! Now, it's up to Jabba.

Jabba: Well done, boys! You're moving on!

Demyx: Yes!

Panther: Alright!

Bib Fortuna: Well done, boys! Next up, playing "Learning to Fly" by Tom Petty, here is N. Tropy, N. Trance and Dr. Nefarious!

The guys begin playing fabulously. Backstage, Cortex, N. Gin, Tiny Tiger, N. Brio and Strong Bad are talking with each other.

Cortex: Alright, you guys. We're up after this. You find a good song?

Strong Bad: Oh, yeah. It's the best we've chosen.

Cortex: Let's see. Oh, this _is _good.

Tiny: Sir, they've finished!

Cortex: Alright, remember the drill.

N. Gin: Oh, Jabba's going to LOVE us for this!

N. Brio: Yes, sir! This is going to be good.

Strong Bad: We are going to beat these losers for sure.

Back on stage.

Bib Fortuna: Nice going, guys! Best review from Jabba yet! Our final act needs no introduction. Introducing, our last group: Cortex, N. Gin, Tiny, N. Brio and Strong Bad! Those guys?! What the bluh-what?! Who invited_ them_ up here?! Fine. Let's hear your act.

The guys are now going to sing "Tearing Up My Heart" from N'SYNC. Wait. Are you serious?

Cortex: As serious as can be.

Oh, this is going to end badly. The group begins singing and dancing. I feel like burying my head in the ground than watch this torment.

General Scales: What are they doing?!

Ripto: These guys are dumber than I thought!

Papu Papu: Where turtle king?

Bowser is dancing in the group. Everyone is in total shock and disgust. The song ends.

Cortex: Well, what do you think?

Rilla Roo shoots himself.

N. Gin: I think we did good.

Xigbar: You guys suck!

Cortex: That means we won?

Dingodile: Rilla Roo shot himself!

Bib Fortuna: Silence! It is now Jabba's decision.

Jabba: Guess what, you guys? You won the surprise!

The six idiots: Yay!!!

Jabba presses the button that sends the losers down to the pit of the rancor.

Six idiots: What? AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!

The idiots fall into the pit and they are eaten alive by the rancor. Everyone cheers. Suddenly, a blast is heard from a distance and everyone turns. A bounty hunter named Boushh comes in with Chewbacca, portrayed by Crunch Bandicoot, with a chain around his neck.

Boushh: I have come to place the bounty on this wookiee.

C-3PO: Chewbacca!

Ripper Roo and XANA's tarantula: Huh?

Chewbacca: Hey, Jabba. Nice to see you.

Jabba: At last, we have the mighty Chewbacca. Protocol droid.

C-3PO: I am here, your excellency. Yes?

Jabba: Wash my back while I discuss a price.

C-3PO: I'm already regretting this.

Jabba: In exchange for Chewbacca, I will give you 15,000 credits.

Boushh: Make it 50,000. No less.

Jabba: What?!

Jabba pushes 3PO back really hard and he crashes.

C-3PO: Don't worry. The spear gun broke my fall. Ow.

Jabba: What do think I am, an ATM machine?! What happens if I refuse to pay?

Boushh: Then you get this.

Boushh activates a thermal detonator.

C-3PO: He's got a thermal detonator.

Boba Fett and her bodyguards raise their guns to Boushh. Everyone panics.

Ripper Roo: He's going to kill us!

Dr. Eggman: I have so much to live for!

Jabba: Ha ha ha ha ha ha. This bounty hunter is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive.

Boba Fett and the Brat Girls slowly put down their guns.

Jabba: Tell you what: I will give you 35,000 and I suggest you take it. That is my final offer.

Boushh: Very well.

Boushh deactivates the detonator.

C-3PO: Whew. That's a relief.

Jabba: Take the wookiee to the holding chamber for further punishment.

The gamorreans take Chewbacca away to his prison cell. The party music resumes.

Bib Fortuna: Would you like a drink?

Boushh: Diet Dr. Pepper, please.

Bib Fortuna: Very Well.

Boushh and 3PO look at Boba Fett as she nods once. As for Chewbacca, he is being taken to his prison cell. We then see a palace guard, who happens to be Lando, portrayed by Von Clutch, in disguise. Chewbacca is then locked away in his cell.

Next Time:

Chapter 3: Return of a Friend


	3. Chapter 3: Return of a Friend

Star Wars

Episode VI: Return of the Jellybeans

Chapter 3: Return of a Friend

Later that night, Jabba's chambers were all but empty. The room was dark and black as night. Near the entrance, the bounty hunter Boushh is seen entering the room. He then looks around to see if the coast is clear and heads straight for Captain Solo. After pressing a few switches, Boushh frees Han from the carbonite. Once thawed out, Han falls straight to the floor. Boushh helps him up, but Han is shivering uncontrollably.

Boushh: Just relax for a moment. You are free of the carbonite. Shh. You have hibernation sickness.

Han: I can't see.

Boushh: Your sight will return in time.

Han: Where the heck am I?

Boushh: Jabba's palace.

Han: And who exactly are you?

Boushh takes off his helmet and it is revealed to be Princess Leia, portrayed by Coco Bandicoot.

Leia: Someone who loves you.

Han: Leia.

The two kiss.

Leia: You know, I'm starting to get used to this whole "Me falling in love with you" thing. It kind of feels good. Anyway, I have to get you out of here.

As Leia helps Han up, they then hear Jabba laughing.

Han: Oh, tell me that's not who I think it is.

A curtain behind them pulls back and reveals Jabba and the others watching them.

Jabba: Oh, that was the most romantic thing I've ever seen. I feel like I'm about to cry.

N. Trance: You should an academy award for gagging me with a spoon.

Bowser Jr.: I felt like throwing up after watching that.

Han: Look, Jabba. I can pay you back. I just need more time.

Jabba: It's too late for that, Solo. You should have paid me when you had the chance. I must admit, you were good to have around. But now, you're bantha fodder.

Everyone laughs.

Dingodile: You're in trouble now!

Gulp: Should have paid your dues!

Jabba: Take him away!

A SharpClaw and Crush take Han to his cell.

Han: Look, I can make you a deal! It's a great offer!

Jabba: Bring her to me.

Lando and Xigbar bring Leia to Jabba.

Leia: We have powerful friends. You'll regret this.

Jabba: I highly doubt it.

C-3PO: Well, this isn't going to end well.

Han is thrown into a cell and suddenly hears a growling noise. The growling noise is revealed to be Chewbacca.

Han: Chewie?

Chewbacca: Han!

Han: Chewie, is that you?

Chewbacca hugs Han.

Han: It's okay. Chewie, I can't see.

Chewbacca: Sorry.

Han: Now, what in tarnation is going on here?

Chewbacca: Luke sent me and Leia to rescue you.

Han: Luke? The boy's crazy. Why would he-

Chewbacca: You should watch what you say. He's a Jedi Knight now.

Han: A Jedi Knight?! How long was I frozen? Two years? I vanish and something big happens? This is nuts.

Chewbacca hugs Han again.

Chewbacca: Oh, I've missed you.

Han: Chewie, it's okay. I'm okay.

Chewbacca: My friend.

Han: Let go of me, you stupid flea bag! You're crushing my spine! Don't make me shave you again!

Moments later, back at the entrance, the door opens and a mysterious robed figure enters the palace. Two gamorreans stop the figure, but the figure uses Force Grip on them both. It is revealed that the figure is Luke Skywalker. Back in Jabba's chambers, the big guy is asleep and Leia is below him in her classic slave outfit. Koala Kong, Pete, and Mephiles are playing poker.

Koala Kong: Read 'em and weep, boys. A full house of kings and queens.

Pete: I have a higher full house of aces and sixes.

Mephiles: Oh, yeah? Well, I have a straight flush.

Koala Kong and Pete: Ah, dang.

Mephiles: Stinks to be you.

Luke enters the chamber and Bib Fortuna confronts him.

Bib Fortuna: What are you doing here? Jabba does not want you-

Luke: I have come to speak with your master.

Bib Fortuna: You are not allowed here. Leave immediately.

Luke: You will take me to see Jabba now.

Bib Fortuna: I will take you to see Jabba now.

Luke: You serve your master well.

Bib Fortuna: I serve my master well.

Luke: And you will be greatly rewarded.

Bib Fortuna: And I will be greatly rewarded.

C-3PO: Master Luke! He's here!

Bib Fortuna: Master.

Jabba wakes up.

Bib Fortuna: Luke Skywalker is here.

Jabba: I told you not to admit him!

Luke: I must be allowed to speak.

Bib Fortuna: He must be allowed to speak.

Jabba: You weak-minded fool! He's using an old Jedi Mind Trick.

Jabba tosses Bib Fortuna aside.

Bib Fortuna: The spear gun broke my fall. Who keeps putting it here, anyway?

Luke: You will free Captain Solo immediately.

Jabba: Ha! Your mind games won't work on me, boy.

Luke: Nevertheless, I will take Han back. You can agree to this or be destroyed. Your choice.

C-3PO: Luke, you're standing on the-

Jabba: I give Captain Solo to no one.

Luke Force Pulls Ripper Roo's blaster and Jabba pushes the switch to the rancor's lair. Luke and a gamorrean falls in.

Gamorrean: Me alright.

Jabba's platform moves to see the rancor's lair with Boba Fett standing next to him. Boba Fett removes her helmet to reveal Nina's face. The door down below opens and the rancor, portrayed by a scorporilla, is revealed.

C-3PO: The rancor!

Gamorrean: Ah! Me getting out of here!

The rancor grabs the gamorrean and eats him. Luke tries to hide from the beast, but to no avail. Jabba laughs as Boba Fett watches with him. Like in the movie, Luke grabs a bone right before the rancor grabs him. As the rancor attempts to eat him, Luke puts the bone in its mouth and hides. The rancor crushes the bone and heads straight for Luke. Our hero grabs a rock and smashes its hand and rushes toward a door behind him. Soon, he notices a switch next to the rancor's door. He grabs a rock, throws it at the switch, and closes the door on the rancor when it was about to enter, thus killing it.

Rancor: Ow! Why do you harm me? I just wanted to eat you! Do you even know what it's like to not eat for two days?! It sucks.

The rancor dies.

Jabba: Bring Captain Solo and the wookiee! They will all pay for this outrage!

Luke is dragged out and is reunited with Han and Chewbacca before standing before Jabba.

Luke: Han!

Han: Luke!

Luke: Great to see you again.

Han: Yeah. What's going on now?

Luke: Eh, it's the same.

Han: Not good, huh?

Luke: Yeah.

Han: Where's Leia?

Leia: I'm here.

Jabba: Now then, since you killed my beloved rancor, I sentence you to be sent to the Dune Sea. There, you will be thrown into the Great Pit of Carkoon, home of the almighty sarlacc.

Han: That doesn't sound so bad.

Jabba: You will know the true meaning of pain when you will be slowly digested for a thousand years.

Han: Why couldn't I just keep my big mouth shut?

The gang is taken to Jabba's sail barge.

Next time:

Chapter 4: The Great Pit of Carkoon


	4. Chapter 4: The Great Pit of Carkoon

Star Wars

Episode VI: Return of the Jellybeans

Chapter 4: The Great Pit of Carkoon

Out in the Dune Sea, Jabba's sail barge along with some desert skiffs are on their way to the lair of the deadly sarlacc. Inside the sail barge, R2 is seen serving drinks.

R2-D2: Drinks! Get your drinks here! We got Coke, Pepsi, Mountain Dew, Dr. Pepper, Sprite, Root Beer and a dead womp rat.

Koala Kong: I'll take a sprite.

R2-D2: There you go.

Dr. Eggman: Let me have a Mountain Dew.

R2-D2: Fine with me.

Strong Bad: I'll have a Cold One.

R2-D2: Strong Bad?! I thought you got eaten by the rancor!

Strong Bad: He did. I'm actually XANA disguised as Strong Bad. Pretty impressive, huh?

R2-D2: No.

Strong Bad: Oh.

Leia looks outside on our heroes. Outside, Luke, Han, Chewbacca, Dingodile, Lando, N. Tropy and N. Trance are on the skiff en route to the Pit of Carkoon.

Han: Hey, I think my eyes are getting better. Instead of seeing all black, I see a whole lot of light.

Luke: There's nothing to see here. I used to live here.

Han: Well, you're gonna die here. How ironic is that?

Luke: Just stick close to Chewie and Lando. I've got everything figured out.

Han: Oh. Great.

Back inside, Leia is pulled towards Jabba.

Jabba: Soon you will learn to appreciate me.

3PO bumps into R2 and spills all the drinks.

C-3PO: R2, what are you doing here?

R2-D2: I'm serving drinks.

C-3PO: Well, yes. I can see that. They're going to execute Master Luke. And if we're not careful, us as well.

R2-D2: Re-lax. Everything is under control.

C-3PO: I hope so.

They arrive at the pit and Luke looks down at the sarlacc. It is a ghastly beast with tentacles, spikes, a beak and the fact that it's portrayed by the King of Town.

C-3PO over microphone: Victims of the almighty sarlacc, his excellency wishes that you will die honorably. But for those who wish to beg for mercy, speak now or forever hold thy peace.

Han: 3PO, first of all, this isn't a wedding! It's a death sentence! Secondly, tell that overgrown bug larvae he will get no pleasure from us! Right?

Chewbacca: Yep. You die first.

Han: Shut up, Chewie!

Luke: Jabba, this is your last chance. Free us or die.

Jabba over microphone: Move him into position.

Luke is now on the edge of the diving board and is about to fall. He looks at Lando and nods. Luke sees R2 on the deck of the sail barge. Luke gives a salute, R2 opens a hatch in the top, Luke hangs on to the board in the movie and R2 fires Luke's brand new lightsaber like in the movie. The battle over the sarlacc commences. During the fighting, N. Tropy falls into the pit.

N. Tropy: I don't die this way!

Sarlacc: Mmm. Not a bad morsel.

A few seconds later, Dingodile falls in.

Dingodile: Crikey!

On the sail barge deck, Mephiles arms the gun and aims at the skiff. Lando wrestles with N. Trance and Mephiles fires and Lando and N. Trance tumble. Lando, however, hangs onto a rope like in the movie. Boba Fett and her bodyguards comes out, activates her jetpack, and flies over to the skiff. Luke cuts Boba's weapon in half. Chewie and Han fall to the ground.

Han: Chewie, you're hit? Where is it?

Boba uses the whipcord on Luke and ties him up. The brat girls are beating the crap out of him. Han sweeps a brat girl off of her feet and into the pit.

Brat Girl 1: No!

A blaster fire knocks down Boba Fett and her other bodyguard. On the other skiff, Dr. Nefarious, Ripto, XANA's roachsters, Crush and General Scales are shooting at the barge. Luke jumps over while Boba Fett gets back on her feet. Like in the movie, Han and Chewie are about to help Lando and Chewbacca warns Han.

Chewbacca: Han, it's Boba Fett! She's back up!

Han: Hang on!

The other brat girl steps in and stops them cold. Han uses a staff and throws the brat girl overboard and hits Boba's jetpack, sending her flying.

Boba Fett: What the- AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! Getting sick! About to puke!

She slams her head into the sail barge.

Boba Fett: OW!

Eventually, she falls and goes into the sarlacc.

Boba Fett: Getting dizzy...No. Not the Sarlacc! AAAAHHH!!!

The sarlacc belches.

Sarlacc: Mm. Best thing I've ever tasted. Needs more butter or gravy.

Back inside the sail barge, Leia slams the microphone onto the power generator and the windows close.

Dr. Eggman: The power's out!

Ripper Roo: What do we do?!

Leia then gets behind Jabba and uses her chains to strangle him.

Back outside, Luke sends Crush and Dr. Nefarious into the sarlacc.

Crush: Mommy!

Back inside the sail barge, Leia continues to strangle Jabba until he gurgles and dies.

The skiff outside with Han and Chewbacca begins to weaken as Han is now dangling with Chewbacca hanging on. Luke notices Mephiles firing on the skiff and jumps over to the sail barge. Xigbar comes out of a shaft as Luke attempts to climb up and Luke throws him down to the sarlacc. Luke gets on board the sail barge and takes down Mephiles. While he's busy doing that, one of the sarlacc's tentacles grabs Lando's leg.

Lando: EEAAAHHH!!!

Han: Chewie, give me the blaster!

Lando: Hey, I thought you were blind!

Han: Don't worry! I can see clear as day!

Lando: Don't hit me! Don't hit me!!

Han shoots the sarlacc's tentacle.

Sarlacc: OW!

Han and Chewbacca pulls Lando up. Inside the sail barge, R2 breaks Leia's chain and they escape along with 3PO. On the deck, Leia emerges.

Luke: Leia, get the gun! Point it at the deck!

Leia gets on the main gun and points it at the sail barge. 3PO and R2 fall off the barge and into the sand. Luke grabs a rope, grabs Leia, fires the gun and they both swing to the skiff with Han, Chewbacca, and Lando.

Luke: Let's go. And don't forget the droids.

Lando: We're on our way.

Before they left, our heroes grabbed the droids and escaped when the sail barge blew up. Jabba and his band of smugglers are all but dead. We then cut to the Millennium Falcon and Luke's X-Wing as they leave Tatooine for the last time. Luke and the Falcon go their separate ways for now. Cut to Luke in his X-Wing.

Luke: I'll meet you back at the fleet.

Leia over intercom: Hurry. The Alliance has something that will aid us against the Empire.

Luke: I will.

Han over intercom: Luke, thanks. Thanks for saving my skin. I owe you one, pardner.

R2-D2: Let me guess: We're going to the Dagobah system?

Luke: That's right, R2.

R2-D2: I don't get it. Why do you want to go back there?

Luke: I have a promise to keep to an old friend.

Luke heads off to return to the Dagobah system to see Jedi Master Yoda.

Next Time:

Chapter 5: The Truth is Told


End file.
